Friday, July 08, 2005

The WNBA...It's Fantastic

So I went to a Mystics game last night for the first time since the first home game in franchise history. Now I had expected to see bad basketball, so I wasn't surprised there. However, all the extracurricular things going on in the crowd made this one of the most enjoyable sports outings I've had. I know some of yall are like "WHAT?" But, seriously, this was one hilarious evening.

I knew there would be a lot of lesbians at the game, but, WOW. I was not expecting to see THAT many. I mean they were mostly dom lesbians too with their Steve Harvey shape-ups. I'm not tryna judge, so do what you do, but imagine walking into a Wizards game and 75% of the crowd being flamboyantly gay males. Yeah, that would throw you off right? That's what last nite was the equivalent of.

So, you know how they show people on the big screen and people automatically start dancing. Well, there was little girl who won the dance contest by doing some of that St. Louis dancing the young folks be doing these days. The girl couldn't have been any older than 8 so she had no business doing it. That's not the point tho. During the next time out, they did the big screen thing again and another little girl decided she was going to do the same thing, but the girl did one shake and then you see the right hand of MOMS step in and you watch in laughter as the girl sits down embarassed, slumped in her seat. It was good to see parenting like that. Her daughter shouldn't know the dance, but at least her mother wasn't having it. The mom probably got the loudest cheer of the night too.

Last but not least, the lady in front of me and her daughter. I swear she looked like Tre Johnson's fraternal twin sister. Alana Beard made a thread and this lady got up to cheer spilling her water all over her hair and shirt. How the damn water got above her head like that is beyond me but it's how she didn't react to drenching herself. She just sat right back down like she hadn't spilled water on herself. Now her daughter was three; I know this because she told me about four times. She got restless and started running up and down the aisles. Well the event staff don't take to kindly to that and the lady working in our section ended up having to physically take the little girl back to her mother. Man, did the little girl not want to go though. She fought that event staff lady all the way and had, as my uncle would say, "the look of mophadiction" on her face. She was mad as hell. She was cute though.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

For the Kids...

This message is for all my recently graduated high school seniors who are going to college next year. Congratulations for making it this far, especially if your black, because you've already beaten the odds. However, there are some things you need to know before you step foot on a college campus:

1. College is just like high school. Don't get it twisted. It's still going to be fake people, it's going to be nerds, it's going to be popular folks, it's going to be unpopular folks. You know that person, you got lunch with that you wish would give you a reason to fight, somebody is going to take that person's place when you get to college. It's just going to take a while for you figure out how it's going to play.

2. Be realistic about your major. Seriously, I know every kid has some big dreams about what they want to be when they grow up, but by now, you should know what you're capable of. If 10th grade Biology kicked your ass, Pre-Med ain't gonna work for you. This may be a shot in the dark, but I believe you're going to be good at science if your going to be trying operate on somebody. If you barely passed the government test at the end of May of your senior year, Barack Obama you are not.

3. Going to college does not erase what you did in high school. You don't get a clean slate. I'm not talking about grades and talking about actions. If you were a slore in high school, than you are a slore. If them fools from your block ran trains on you a couple times, guess what, that football team at Morgan State can't wait until you get on campus.

4. Go get some Tums, Pepcid AC, Pepto Bismol or Maalox. You will need it. They brought out the big guns when you went for your campus visit. You were like "man, this food is right." Two weeks later when your stomach is in knots, you gonna belike "man, this shit is wrong."

I do it for the kids, now go to school, drink yourself into a stuper and I'll see you in a year and half when you finally realize "School just ain't for me."

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

I don't want to see that...

Ok, so I work at a high-end fitness facility right. Most of our members are white. So whenever I go to the locker room to use the bathroom or something, why do the old white guys have to be in there having a full conversation...NAKED. I mean come on now, have you no shame. Then these idiots have the nerve to want to speak to me while they're naked. I'm not having a conversation with a naked man, put some clothes on and then I can tell you have a nice day.


So New York lost the Olympic bid to London today. Too bad half of New York probably didn't notice. If there was ever a city that is un-Olympic, it's New York. Not that it's a bad thing, but New York just has too much going on already. I mean when half of the city residents don't want it and the elected leaders don't see it fit to set aside funding for an Olympic Stadium, the writing is on the wall. What's sad though is that New York's bid was doomed from the jump and the previous structure of the United States Olympic Committee was too corrupt to see it. Had they've saw it, DC, San Francisco or Houston would've been representing the United States. Now, I don't think any American city would've won this time around because just in case you haven't noticed, the USA isn't the most popular country in the world right now. However, none of those other cities would've had less votes than Madrid, a city that had to hold sporting events without fans because entire stadiums would be chanting racial slurs at athletes of African descent. That is just sad.


The fourth of July was this past week and I just started thinking about some of the holidays we celebrate. As a black man in America, I have no f-in business celebrating that holiday. The Declaration of Independence didn't free us. All men may have been created equal, but, we weren't even whole men. We were 3/5 of a man. Sure, everybody loves the day off, I can fake on that. Do we really need to be going out and buying American themed outfits and watching the fireworks? Hell, even the country we were gaining our independence from outlawed slavery before America did.


Me and the misses are back together now and it feels good. We put each other through a lot and I'm so happy I can get through an entire conversation without getting upset with her. I think we both have a renewed spirit to be a better person for one another. I'm really looking forward to seeing our relationship grow.