Friday, March 30, 2007

“You Can’t Be Me….I’m a Rock Star”

This is another collaboration. I told you...I'm like the hot artist now...everybody wanna be on a single. This is my homie Boot talking about a subject that I was going to address personally. He said he wanted to speak on it...who am I to deny him the floor?

Sityosillyassdown. You are NOT a rock star. Nothing like it. Lemme tell you why……

First off lemme shout out Big Gee for allowing me the venue to scream on these bamma ass broads and negroes for a second.

“You can’t be me….I’m a rock star”– Pharrell

To my knowledge that was the first time I heard a rapper make reference to this weirdness that is upon us. Now before cats start screaming wild and kirking…..paying homage to Run DMC and their brilliant efforts wirh Aerosmith back in the day…..THIS ain’t THAT. Lemme explain…..

Back in the 80’s when hip-hop and rock fused…..there was NO identity crisis among the 2. You ain’t see Jam Master Jay trade in his bucket hat for a Mohawk. And I doubt very seriously that Steven Tyler even CONSIDERED for a second about rocking a velour adidas tracksuit. Cats did what they did yet remained true to what they really are. Not saying stepping outside the box isn’t cool but Inner City youths looking like extras in an xgames ad is beyond my realm of comprehension.

Like seriously……why does Shaquanna have a Mohawk? Why does Leroy have on skateboard shoes….and that nigga couldn’t skateboard if his life depended on it? GETWITISM AT IT’S FINEST. Lack of shyt QUALITY to be proud of in their OWN sectors. Or simply a desire to be THAT different that it breeds true bammafication. Whatever the reason….I don’t like it.

In my OWN neighborhood I see it DAILY. Lil boys running around with wallet chains…..boney ass jeans…….extra medium shirts. The Females…..mohawks…..mardi gras beads…...fiddy’leven colors……all that on top of some wild color cheap ass pumps. The Hell?!?!?! Mo I don’t know about YA’LL but when I was growing up(I’m 26) ANY of the above woulda got you FRIED…..mercilessly. How did the shyt we used to wear on BAMMA day at school become “The Style”? What part of the game is THIS?

At this point it’s not even a matter of Old School Vs. New School. It’s a matter of individuality…..pride…..self worth…..MATCHING CLOTHES!!!!!!!!!! I feel for the 14-21 generation. They are living the life of someone they simply can’t relate to. Gone are the days where your clothing choice reflected your PERSONAL sense of style. Where we are NOW……shyt I don’t even know. Can’t say “you’re being an individual” because errybody looks just like your bamma ass. You just another offcolor gitwit weirdo that was too lazy to match your gear up. Nothing More.


These youngins need to come to the realization that Pharrell….Jim Jones….Gwen Stefani…..etc. get PAID to look like the asses they are. Your dumb ass just dropped $100 on a super tight shirt that don’t cover 20% of your arm. You have a wallet chain……and no wallet. And don’t get to wrecking…….I’ll be DAMNED if I get slumped by a nigga in stretch jeans. That shyt ain’t happening no day of the week. I don’t care how legit your left hook is….you ain’t got NO mobility in them nuthuggaz mo. NONE. A quick bob and weave and you gon split your Sergios young man. Come up off it. Get you some Levi’s.


I can’t wait to see what fashion has in store for us next…..one thing I’m almost POSITIVE I can say about it is I will not be participating.


“We taking Rock and Roll To another Level……Iced out Skullheads” – Juelz Santana

Sad Damn Case

Lewd…..Offensive…..Crude……..BOOT!!!!!!!

Monday, March 26, 2007

Why Men Need to See "300?"

Today we have another guest appearance on my blog which apparently is becoming more popular. This is my homie Bill. Not William...not Will...BILL. He's a wild dude but he's about his business. He's the only person I know that I'm certain will be a millionaire one day. In his words: "It's not IF I'm going to be a millionaire, it's how many times over." Enjoy.

Wdup,

I am a man of many names, to the brothers in the South I am known as the Ill one, the Indians call me Dances with "Drunken Banter", the folks in the Far East call me "Dapper-san", in the west I am known as "The Illmighty Bill Cashmere, the International Man of All that is Dapper." I’m probably one of the most Politically incorrect people you’ll ever meet in your life. With the right song, and the correct amount of cognac I’m probably one of the most entertaining chaps you’ll meet. No my name is not William, my name really is Bill, and yes I am black I’ll probably offend a lot of you from time to time as I post in here, but so what right. It’s so much to say, and oh to express it, it’s like trying to put an ocean into a jar, now I know what they go through making my burrito at chipotle, all that Tenochitlan goodness SURELY can’t fit in that wrap.

My comrade Gee has given me the opportunity to spreak freely here. Join me as I push freedom of speech to the limit and change the very fabric of the status quo.. What will I talk about, whatever, the stuff I say will make you laugh and think simultaneously.


Why Men need to go see 300. Let me park here for a minute.


Real talk, this movie 300 is one of the best movies I seen in a minute. I’m not going to spoil it if you haven’t seen it, but you really need to see this.

If you don’t know bout greek culture, the Spartans were like the navy seals of the greek time. I mean these dudes were thorough. A lot of weirdness went w/ them other type greek nations, but these niggaz were bread to become fighters. If you want to learn more about them you can slide on to wikipedia. But anyway from day one a Spartan was bread to be a cold ass nigga. Ay Gee can I curse in here (you get a pass for the first time Bill)?? Just change the word nigga to brother or dude or whatever. I’ll try to keep it clean for my demographic. Spartans were seen as some of the most invincible soldiers on earth. Imagine a white Fred Williamson w/ a sword and a shield. A small amry of them was taking about whoever, they were that thorough. From age 7, they were baptized in the fire of combat, real manly shit. They pulled a Bear Grylls on one bama and sent him into the wilderness. some of these niggaz were weeded out in the process, but if you lasted you were a force to be reckoned with, Spartans were tought NEVER to surrender NEVER TO RETREAT EVER.

I’m not going to ruin the plot but in the movie a messenger come to King Lionitus, main man fakin’ out here really on his daha (on your DAHA-derived from the Youtube star, Solja, meaning "Your crazy"), talking bout the King of Persia is coming through and he needs to submit to him asap. He even offered him to be warload of Greece if he submit to him and rever him as the god-king, he was a wild boy there. King of Sparta wasn’t having that because they don’t surrender ever no matter what, to do such would go against the code. They go to battle, and the Spartans aint fakin, bamas getting thrombled left and right.

So why as a man do you need to see this movie. Well look around, its too much foolery going on, too many of yall out there holding your lady purse. Word life, I hope you get kufi smacked for doing that. You out there changing your opinions to get in good w/ the broad. Let’s say you tell a chick “Man, I hate potatoes,” and she say “really, I love potatoes,” and you said “ yeah they aiight” huh, nah man nah don’t change it up now mo, don’t EE’UM try to change it up. Go see the movie, it’ll make a man out of you. If we had movies like this wouldn’t be too much foolery, 300 is like GI Joe B.C. It’s too much pansy’ing going on out here. What happened to Mr. T, GI Joe all the manly cartoons and movies, they’re gone mo, they outta here. Afternoon cartoons like transformers are replaced with dr. phil, and oprah. I don’t remember what I was watching at 4pm, but it definitely wasn’t oprah it was darkwing duck or something cool. Something with some action. We need more action movies, men need to learn not to back down be a man stop being a sucker. I can remember in October I had a funny convo to one of my homegirls at my office that men don’t hold purses. She told me her husband will hold her purse for her. Show me a nigga who holds a purse and I’ll show you a nigga who wear man bags. Ah man you a sucker if you rock the man bag. I aint never seen no Spartan rock a manbag. You’d get whipped w/ the cat of nine tails if you got caught rocking a man bag. Yeah a cat of nine tails, that’s the whip that they hit jesus with. Like I say don’t let me catch you doing that. King Lionitus wouldn’t be holding his wife’s purse. What manner of man yee be that holding a woman bag. Thou represents all that is pansy.

Go see that movie, you’re eyes will open, a new sense of man will emerge from your once Dr. Phil watching self. It’ll make a man outta ya. When’s the last time you seen a movie and a nigga got decapitated that’s right, they slicing niggaz out this joint, fighting galore, blood everywhere, niggas getting shanked with spears and the Spartans had no fear NONE, whatsoever they wasn’t backing down for nothing. They were taught not to retreat.

Even chicks like 300, you know why, because they love manly men, they recognize the realness in that movie. They like niggaz who don’t back down and try to agree w/ them all the time, the Spartans stayed true 110% True story go see it, see it now.

TOLD YOU Bill was wild...LOL.