What a Dumbass: The Sequel

In light of recent events. I have to shed some light on some folks who've made some really stupid choices recently.

Bode Miller: Ok, so you're a free spirited Downhill skier who goes against the "system." You like to party a lot and you enjoy the occasional cocktail. Ok, sometimes there are some lingering effects from those cocktails when it's time to ski. You ski anyway (this is really stupid and dangerous, but not the most idiotic thing he did). No, you were King Idiot when you admitted to the world that you did it on 60 minutes. What in the hell good did you think was going to come of that? The International Skiing Federation could, in good conscience, not let you ski anymore because you ski drunk and that's very dangerous. Way to go genius.

Marion Barry: Wow. In the immortal words of Rick James, "Cocaine is a helluva drug." After everything you've been through with getting caught on camera with a woman doing crack and the brand new charges of tax evasion, you go and do this. You test positive for cocaine. I guess you were high when you decided to move the MLK day parade to April too. This man has created a lot of programs for young black people in DC, but when you do this, you flush all the good you've done down the toilet. BRILLIANT.

Marcus Vick: Yes, when most people put their hand down on the hot stove, they usually pick it up quickly and never put it there again. Apparently the younger brother of Ron Mexico likes the fire. You get arrested twice and get kicked out of school. The school is forgiving enough to let you back in but you have to be on your best behavior. So, you give the "One Finger Salute" to the fans in Morgantown, WV. They let you slide. Then you get arrested on December 17 and try to hide it. Knowing that your arrest might come out and you should tread lightly, you decided to Elvis Dumervil's calf as a doormat in the Gator Bowl. It's over for you. Just like a guy who doesn't get it, you don't care because you always have the NFL or your rich older brother to fall back on. Then I guess you got a little too hungry and thought it would be cool to pull your gun on some people in a fast food parking lot. Was the Madagascar Happy Meal toy really that important? Smart guy eh?

The woman in Blue Springs, MO: So you are your boyfriend get into an argument. You decide to take his cell phone, but he wants back. What's the best way to keep him from getting it? Bash it with a baseball bat? Nope. Run it over with your car? Nah young? Flush down the toilet? Negative. You decided to swallow the phone. That's right, you took that be apart of the network thing seriously. All jokes aside, at what point in your line of thinking, did swallowing the phone sound like the most logical choice? Out of all these situations, THIS is the one that I can't, in the least bit, say I can see how that person did that. I just don't understand. When my mother was smoking and I tried to keep the cigarettes away from her, I didn't chew them. T-mobile must've been good to you...Want more?